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Why Younger Women Are Attracted to Older Men

Dear Dating Doctor:

My friends and I are in our mid-twenties but are dating men in their late thirtiesand early forties. We're enjoying our relationships and they appear to be working out quite well. Whenwe have dated men our own age, we haven't been as successful. Why do you think this is so?

Dating older and loving it


Dear Dating Older:

If you examine it closely, your situation makes a great deal of sense. Men in theirtwenties have a very different set of priorities than men in their thirties or forties and "seasoned" menare often more mature. The nice thing is, in this case, you and your friends are the beneficiaries.

Twenty-something year old men are still searching for who they are, what talents they possess and the typeof women they desire. They are experiencing many aspects of life for the first time. Physically, theyare approaching their sexual prime and seek physical relationships more often. Sex, money,personal-improvement, material possessions, sports and status are their primary interests and motivationalforces. Their 'me' mentality has not yet matured into a "we" philosophy and jealousy often surfacesseemingly without provocation.

For older men, this is not the case. By their late thirties, most know who they are or at least who theyare not. Many are in the second or third phases of their careers and have learned that there is more tolife than money, sex and prestige. You will find that they avoid playing the "mind games' that youngermen engage in as they realize this is simply a waste of time. They have learned what physically,emotionally and intellectually satisfies a woman. Seasoned men will be more responsible, get things doneand have a life beyond their relationship with you. They will not hang on your every word, nor pressureyou for sex, but will truly appreciate the time they spend with you. They realize that in today's busyand complicated world, time is precious.

Women assume very different roles in the lives of men depending on the age of the man they are dating.Younger men see women as being there for them. Older men take great personal pride in dating youngerwomen and strive to connect with them on their level.

Women indicated that time spent with older men was more meaningful, loving, and enjoyable. They had theability to hold women's attention, had more life experiences to draw upon and focused less on themselves.

Dating older men is not for all women, but if you have found the man of your dreams, and he happens to bea bit older, I say to you, coo coo kachoo Mr. Robinson.


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